This is where the thoughts that occur during my struggle to find romance end up.

Feel free to ask for advice, or just stick around and read or whatever :)

17/Bisexual/Committed to the most perfect man for me <3

"obsession"

Remember Tuna? Well, the other day, we had a nice conversation about stuff.

It was during a Jazz band thing, and he was sitting in with our band. With the way things worked out, he ended up sitting next to me.

I’m not interested in him anymore, but it was weird. I don’t know, he just makes me so nervous.

It’s probably because I had that HUGE crush on him throughout my junior year. And boy, was it bad.

I mean, if it wasn’t already clear through this blog, I was CRAZY obsessed with him.

Like, and not “Oh he’s so cute, I’m obsessed with him tee hee” like a normal girl would say. I mean literally obsessed. I stared at him in band and thought about him in all my spare time and when I listened to music. I was so lonely and desperate, he kinda became my life.

So yeah, I think it makes sense why I was so nervous.

But I’m definitely in no way interested. I do think it’d be cool if we became friends though!

But as lovers, no. I’ve already found the one for me. No use in wasting my time with guys who don’t know what they’re doing and don’t know what they want.

My boyfriend is the absolute best, and he’s my one and only. I love him so much :]

Dec 9th, 2011

Must. Stop. Falling. In. Love. With. Everyone.

Because all I do is hurt myself when I do.

);

Apr 24th, 2011

Remember Tuna?

Well, my best friend, who I mentioned a long time ago, said she’d ask him if he’s interested in anyone right now, and if the opportunity arises, she’ll mention that I find him attractive.

I’m really excited! I’m surprised though, I thought I was done with chasing him :)

I forgot it how good it feels to like someone I can actually see everyday. I guess I’ve been using the internet to forget about how lonely I am.

God, I’m just so happy! It was amazing. As I talked about him with her, I felt that feeling I’ve been trying to bury for so long. My heart started beating faster, and I started getting kind of dizzy. Now I can’t stop thinking about him.

I must have him.

Apr 3rd, 2011

I can’t go around falling in love with every cute face. I must not get carried away just because someone pays a little attention to me.

Mar 11th, 2011

With every day that passes, I become a little less obsessed

This is a really great thing.

I’m more relaxed and I feel like things will come to me easier if I just chill out.

But it’s kinda boring :\

Oh I’m never satisfied hahaha

Feb 24th, 2011

I’m kind of like a dog.

Similar to the way in which they become fascinated with a toy, I become fixated on a person. It’s healthy behavior up until a certain point.

But I’m kind of happy with where I am right now.

And I don’t know how to live any other way.

Feb 13th, 2011

Oh no. It’s happening again.

No. I can’t let this get out of hand. Not this time.

Feb 12th, 2011