This is where the thoughts that occur during my struggle to find romance end up.

Feel free to ask for advice, or just stick around and read or whatever :)

17/Bisexual/Committed to the most perfect man for me <3

"men"

Remember Tuna? Well, the other day, we had a nice conversation about stuff.

It was during a Jazz band thing, and he was sitting in with our band. With the way things worked out, he ended up sitting next to me.

I’m not interested in him anymore, but it was weird. I don’t know, he just makes me so nervous.

It’s probably because I had that HUGE crush on him throughout my junior year. And boy, was it bad.

I mean, if it wasn’t already clear through this blog, I was CRAZY obsessed with him.

Like, and not “Oh he’s so cute, I’m obsessed with him tee hee” like a normal girl would say. I mean literally obsessed. I stared at him in band and thought about him in all my spare time and when I listened to music. I was so lonely and desperate, he kinda became my life.

So yeah, I think it makes sense why I was so nervous.

But I’m definitely in no way interested. I do think it’d be cool if we became friends though!

But as lovers, no. I’ve already found the one for me. No use in wasting my time with guys who don’t know what they’re doing and don’t know what they want.

My boyfriend is the absolute best, and he’s my one and only. I love him so much :]

Dec 9th, 2011

Okay, it’s official. Men above 18 are just absolutely amazing.

Ugh, why can’t I be 18 yet?

afkjwen;lfkjwef

sigh

Jul 22nd, 2011

I like how as soon as I’m talking to another guy, I feel a lot better.

Doesn’t that sound terrible?

It’s okay. I’m a teenager.

And a shallow bitch ahahahaaa

Jul 21st, 2011
Jun 4th, 2011

I swear to god, he rubbed my back a little!

While my friend fumbled with her camera trying to take a picture of me and my cute, older friend together, I felt his hand moving on my shoulder a little bit.

hahaha omg I know I sound like an over-analytical, 12 year old girl, but these little things get me excited!

Surely I’m not the only one who notices these stupid little behaviors towards them from the opposite sex! ;)

May 8th, 2011

The first guy who gets intimate with me is going to get 16 years of sexual frustration forcibly thrust upon him.

Ohoho and it will be excellent.

I will fucking lose it.

And all will be well.

Good lord, how much longer must I wait? guhhhh

Apr 19th, 2011

Tuna and I made a lot of awkward eye contact today.

I’ll accidentally look in his direction, and I’ll find that our eyes meet for a brief millisecond, until I quickly look away.

I really hope this isn’t wishful thinking. It can’t be.

My friend talked to him, and she says that he thinks that I’m a cool cat, but he’s not interested in dating anyone right now. Pssshh, yeah right, everyone says that. I’m determined to change his mind.

But he’s always too busy for me );

I don’t know what to do.

I can’t go another summer alone. I just can’t.

Apr 15th, 2011

I WISH SOME DUDE WOULD JUST TALK TO ME OR SOMETHING

GODDAMMIT

-___-

Mar 29th, 2011

How can I be in love with so many men at once?

Quite easily, as a matter of fact.

Mar 29th, 2011

I’m really lucky with guys.

The first guy I became friends with ended up liking me.

He asked me out and became my first boyfriend.

The second dude I befriended started talking to me after we broke up.

He also ended up liking me, and asked me to homecoming (to which I said no because he’s gross and he’s a jerk).

Please note, I have no guy friends. Though it’s nice to know that when I do, they all find me charming.

I’m hoping I’ll just have to be myself to snag this next one too.

Jan 24th, 2011